In recent years, especially in view of the moral climate that has developed in the last 40 years, it has become very common for men to ask their fiancees to get pregnant as a prerequisite for marriage.
On further investigations you find out that they want to be sure she can get pregnant and sometimes it's his mother who wants to be sure the said girl can bear children. Some men will say girls of nowadays are wayward and won't tell you that they have undergone so many abortions that they might not have a womb anymore. Some women actually desire pregnancy before marriage in order to get the man committed. It is a very common occurrence. It is sad but even Christians are not exempt.
On further investigations you find out that they want to be sure she can get pregnant and sometimes it's his mother who wants to be sure the said girl can bear children. Some men will say girls of nowadays are wayward and won't tell you that they have undergone so many abortions that they might not have a womb anymore. Some women actually desire pregnancy before marriage in order to get the man committed. It is a very common occurrence. It is sad but even Christians are not exempt.
In our culture, 34-year old single ladies will have pressure heaped on them from all angles to get married, but I always believe that one shouldn't lower their standards to get a man because he will always make you think that he is doing you a favour and if he senses desperation, you are just making a rod for your own back for the future.
The obvious hypocrisy that makes it very annoying is men who complain that women are wayward, but don't stop to ask themselves how these ladies became wayward? In actual fact how did the women get wayward? Some men have two, three, four girlfriends on the go and sleep with all of them, stringing them all along, but when it is time for marriage they search frantically for a virgin to marry. How does that work?
First of all, many times infertility is as a result of a problem with man's reproductive system and then, supposing she agrees to get pregnant, and loses the pregnancy, what happens then? He calls off the wedding or what? What if he is involved in an accident and dies before the wedding? Will she call herself a widow? There are so many what ifs.
The ideology reduces women to baby making machines. Single ladies need to tell themselves that "any man that cannot respect my values and integrity is not the man for me". Women need to start seeing themselves as people of worth not a piece of equipment about to be bought. God is deeply concerned with our daily walk, with how we live the Christian life. The Lord came not just to make us children of God and get us into heaven, but to enable us to live as the children of God ought to live in a dark and sinful world that does not know Him. 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 says "Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body"
There are several fertility procedures today and they are very helpful but let us not try to play god, Proverbs 3:7 says Do not be wise in your own eyes; Fear the LORD and turn away from evil. God is the creator of all things, children come from God.God is faithful to his promises.We do not know what God may be doing in our lives - even when it seems like he is not doing anything at all. God can surprise us!
To all the girls who want to get married, a piece of advice i heard from a man of God once, "Ruth patiently waited for her mate Boaz. While you are waiting on YOUR Boaz, don't settle for any of his relatives; Lyin-az, Cheating-az, Dumb-az, Drunk-az, Punk-az, Scrub-az, Lockedup-az, Goodfornothing-az, Lazy-az, and especially his third cousin Beatinyo-az. Wait on your Boaz and make sure he respects Yoaz...."
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