The woman in the picture reminds me of the woman in Songs of Solomon who said "I have taken off my robe--must I put it on again? I have washed my feet--must I soil them again?" That sister was too blessed to be stressed!
So many men don't really understand women and why should they? It's difficult to understand something alien to you; there are some lucky ones who grew up with lots of sisters, so for them it will be easier. Many conflicts in marriage arise because men simply can't comprehend their women and women in general. By this, I mean they don't think in the way that women do. They aren't emotionally wired in the same way that women are. God wired women and men differently because of their unique roles.
It's funny; it seems manufacturers of feminine products understand why women have so many shoes. Take pads for instance; Logic dictates that a spill will require more or less effort to clean based on its size, but whether a dribble or a large spill, that small, medium or large should be able to cover it, and that should mean there's three kinds of pads. But there's not three kinds of pads, there are pads, tampons, panty liners in different sizes , textures colors and scents etc. If Procter and Gamble understand us (probably for marketing and profit-based reasons) why don't you? C'mon Son!
A man needs to understand that his woman needs his support (just like a good bra). Support and love, love that translates into affection, that when absorbed will be poured over your kids. That's why a hug for no reason will make her day. A kiss that is unexpected. A compliment that isn't asked for. A little bit of romance and LOTS of communication. Communication that's honest and genuine and that we don't have to dig 20 feet for! So make her feel like she can be a better woman - not that she SHOULD be, but that she CAN be even if she doesn't listen to you when you tell her that "It is a hundred times more difficult to burn calories than to refrain from consuming them in the first place".
Remember that if a million people tell her she looks good and she knows it, she still wants to hear it from you! If she looks fabulous, then tell her! Pay her a compliment. Tell her she looks amazing. Show her that you are attracted to her. If you're asking why your wife doesn't bother about her appearance as much as she used to, it might be because you stopped complementing her as much as YOU used to. If you don't think she looks so great, then be tactful "You look really nice, but I really love you in that purple dress, try it let's see." She will be happy you like the purple one and you took the time to notice, and she will probably not want the stress of changing into something else afterwards anyway.
Men notoriously have trouble remembering important dates and women place special importance on anniversaries, birthdays, Valentines day, Mothers day etc. If you're married, you should know your anniversary. Celebrating an anniversary may seem arbitrary, but if you place any value on your relationship, you're acknowledging that it had a set point in time when it began and you're celebrating that fact because you want to celebrate your relationship as a whole. It's a wonderful thing and you enjoy it and want to share it with the person you love.
That said, every woman is different Every man needs to know how to love his woman. It's essential for a happy and successful relationship. You will end up being in a relationship with a woman who adores you!
If she cries and you don't know why, ask her! Offer her a tissue. Give her a hug. If she's not in a place to talk, make her a drink; tell her you are there for her and let her be for a while until she is ready to talk. Being supportive is how to love a woman.
One of the reasons premarital counselling is important is because it gives single prospective couples a chance to get to understand some of the differences between men and women. It's couples' empowerment. It's like a multipurpose signboard that helps give directions and advice in terrain you're not yet familiar with, bringing clarity to how each views the other in their “oneness”. Premarital counselling based upon sound biblical principles outlines the roles of the husband and wife as they relate to each other and to their prospective children.
Ijeoma Olujekun.
No comments:
Post a Comment