So it's Worker's Day and we are all at home, kids are watching cartoons or playing. Some are watching cartoons and playing and screaming and whining (they can really multitask when they want to); mum is in the kitchen trying to make a nice breakfast (wondering why she doesn't just give everyone cereal and go back to bed) and if hubby is not on the internet it might just be because the network is down due to the rain...Happy Worker's day People!
When I first got married, I'd get really uptight about my husband leaving
his shoes in the corridor. It annoyed me so much...In the first few
months, I would pick them with love and a smile on my face and bring them
into the room and arrange them on the shoe rack for him. But after a
while, I would get really impatient. I would feel like just throwing them
out of the window! (Perhaps it was the preggy hormones). I would go on
and on about how it upset me that he wouldn't do this one simple thing.
Then I would find them on the shoe-rack the next day. I would smile
triumphantly "I have done it! He is cured" then after a few days the
shoes would be back in the corridor or in the living room!
Then it dawned on me, "Ijeoma, if it is such a simple task, why don't you just do it for him... Instead of rolling your eyes and pouting your lips each time he doesn't do it." Seemed like such a small price to pay for my sanity and peace in my home.
Scripture says if at all possible, live at peace with one another. Peace is very precious. In our marriages, this is extremely important. Walking in peace means that sometimes we just have to let things go. Some things are not worth starting World War II over!
Some spouses get so upset about the little things that they start looking outward at others thinking, "Maybe I, with that person…they wouldn't do this." The enemy makes you feel there is one perfect person somewhere who will not get on your nerves but that is so untrue. No one is perfect. We all make mistakes and get on each others nerves, or they do something that we can't stand; but is it worth disrupting the peace by focusing on that? And majoring on the negativity?
These energy sapping fight slowly build a wedge between us. I love the advice one couple gave" If it won't matter in 10 years, don't fight about it". When we fester on these little things they begin to magnify and like a cancer they spread to other parts of the relationship. All the strife makes you say things you cannot take back and steal valuable time you should have spent loving your spouse and developing your oneness.
Let's all learn to appreciate what our spouse does right and focus on that. Remind yourself of the reasons why you fell in love with that person! Its amazing what a difference it makes when we let the little things go. Besides complements will always get better results than criticism.
Happy Worker's Day!!!
Ijeoma Dibor
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