It is always nice to meet a new guy when you're single and at the brink of losing hope you'll ever meet Mr. Right. If he's a gentleman, chances are he'll easily sleep you off your feet, whisk you into an unexpected romance and before you know it, you're dreaming about buying a house together, having kids and even adopting a puppy from the pets shelter. You have great conversations, he's sensitive to your needs, and he seems perfect for you. Does that mean you shouldn't ask prodding questions? NO! As sensitive and perfect as anyone may be, there are questions you should put on the table and ensure you get answers to before you take a commitment step in his direction.
Question one: Are you a Christian?
Many women hesitate to ask this question because they don't want to come across as prudish and sanctimonious. With this new age of 'going with the flow', everyone wants to be cool and accepted, hence this question takes the backseat, and women try to be observant while they are helplessly falling in love. Ever heard that the initial stages of love cloud a woman's judgement? Oh yeah! It is alwys best to ask this question, listen to his response and ask follow-up questions such as 'what's your relationship with God like?'
Question two: What do you do for a living?
Yeah, many women don't have a problem asking this question. However, there's a new range of women that are eager to not come across as gold diggers, hence they avoid asking this question. I don't know where they got the idea from that such a question places a smear on their integrity. Women who ask also seem to be satisfied with vague answers like "I'm an importer". An importer of what? From where? Where is your office? How does it work? What's your chain of command like at the office? These are questions that will give you insight into whether he is truly employed in legitimate business or involved in shady deals. By the way, if he's not standing on his two feet financially, it's a red flag. You want a man that can take care of his needs and yours.
Question three: Where and with whom do you live?
Believe it or not, this question is important! I have read shocking stories of women who dated their men for months without knowing his place of abode. I'm not saying you should ask this question so you can become a domestic slave in his home, doing all the cooking and cleaning, but it is important to know where the man who's so interested in you stays! And you should know who he stays with! A flatmate or his mother? If he's over 30 and still lives with his mum, you may want to reconsider dating him. He might just be a mummy's boy who's so attached to being with her, any other woman will soon be considered an intrusion.
Question four: What's your view on marriage and starting a family?
This question doesn't mean you are desperate to be married or dying to get him to propose. It is a legitimate question if you want to avoid wasting your time with a man who is too selfish to care about anyone but himself. Whatever he tells you here, accept it! If it's negative, don't hang around because you want to change him. A selfish man is a selfish man; he'll use you, dump you, return to take what's left of you and move to a beautiful island in Zanzibar....ALONE! Because that's how he likes it. Another key question under this would be 'how and why did your last relationship end?' That one always brings an array of interesting answers.
Question five: What are your bad habits?
This is another question we tend to avoid because we don't want to come across as judgemental. Well, judgemental or not, ASK! You need to know! You can even ask direct questions like 'do you smoke? Do you drink excessively? What kind of friends do you keep? Are you a club hopper? etc. Ask ladies! You want to know what you're getting yourself into!
Question six: What's your future ambition?
No woman, and I repeat NO WOMAN irrespective of her social class should be with a man that lacks ambition. You need to ask what his dreams are, where he sees himself in a few years, and see ifa steady relationship is part of his plans. It doesn't mean you're a gold digger who's only after men with ambition! Would you rather be a woman who's dating a vision-less man?
These questions are key questions to ask before you let him take you on a whirlwind romance that may or may not end tragically. Ask questions ladies! They might save you a whole lot of heartache!
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