Generally, nobody wants to goof especially when it comes to
meeting your prospective in-laws. You want to be mindful not to create a tense atmosphere or make a nuisance out of yourself for inappropriate comment or behavior.Thing is most of us would have loved to avoid it but it is something one cant ignore for too long.
Yorubas say in-laws are idols and should be treated that way. This
makes it really important to make the right impressions when meeting one’s
in-laws. The way they perceive you might reflect on your relationship and it just really helps when everyone is happy. Meeting them can be likened to taking a job interview, you have to go
armed with your A game.
Being prepared is the key to making the right impression and the
tips shared below can help you.
Ask your partner for guidelines: Let
your partner spill on the personalities of the members of the house so you will
be prepared on what jokes are right and the ones that might be perceived as
downright insensitive. Your
partner grew up within the family and should be able to guide you on the dos
and don’ts. You can do well with tips like ‘daddy loves golf’ so any discussion
about golf would interest him. Or mummy loves reading so so magazine, so you
can show up bearing a fresh issue.You need to just arm yourself with the basics
just to keep the conversation flow and to make the mood light.
Carefully pick what you wear. You don’t want the first meeting to turn out really
awkward so you might have to keep all your revolutionary fashion forward
outfits for other occasions. If your partner comes from a really conservative
family, you don’t want to shock then out of their skin and have them reciting
the Lord’s Prayer endlessly. All you need do is to keep it simple and decent.
The way you dress says a lot about you. You don’t want to lose their attention
even before you get it.
Don’t go empty handed: It is not courteous to go on a first visit to anyone's house without bearing any kind of gift. It need not be extravagant. Save all that for
the bride price. You could go with a bottle of wine or box of fruits.If there are kids in the house, you could buy chocolates, sweets, biscuits or whatever. Just don't go empty handed. It is not
about the gift, it is the thought behind it that counts. It is also a sign of
goodwill.
Be Yourself: It is understandable that you are trying
to make a great impression but you need not sugarcoat the details about
yourself. Much as you want to create an impression, you also want to gain their
trust. You don’t want a supposedly ‘necessary lie’ to catch up with you. You
also do not want to be perceived as fake. It is alright to be slightly
uncomfortable, just keep it as plain and cool as it can be.
Take deep breaths. Come on, your in-laws are like family too,
if you don’t get it right with them the first time, you can correct the
impression at some other time. You will be fine.
Enjoy your week.
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