Having kids is not peculiar to those that are newly married.
However old or young one is, trust me when I say nobody prepares you for the
anxieties you’d have as a new parent. I remember being scared I was going to
choke my baby because I found it hard to keep my eyes open when feeding her sometimes.
The elderly ones don’t seem to help one’s nerves, they even escalate the
situation with their long list of contradictory don’ts. One thing I have learnt
while on this parenting ‘job’ is that things are not always so complicated and
it is okay to rely on one’s instincts sometimes.
I came across a question on one of the popular blogs and the
author wanted to know if it was alright to have sex in the presence of a seven
month old child. I know she voiced the thoughts of many new parents and I laughed
when I saw it because I could totally relate.
There are always ideal ways to do things like allowing the
baby sleep in the bassinet or cot but really who am I kidding? that almost never
happens because of many reasons; breastfeeding, general nurturing and plenty
other reasons I can’t remember at this time. So, one is faced with the desire
to be with one’s spouse and to not also be the one that would leave one’s child
traumatized. Hmm, classic case of being stuck between the devil and the deep
blue sea right? How does one handle such sensitive matters? Well, it is really
not that serious. Psychologists have said most infants can’t remember things so
if your seven month old child is a spectator while you are going at it, he
really can’t make sense of what you are doing.
Not to make light of it, it is understandable for one to be uncomfortable
when one has an audience irrespective of if the child understands or not so instead
of using the room where the child is sleeping, you could use the other room in
the house or the bathroom where you are more likely to be out of earshot.
You babies are definitely going to grow up so the good news
is the frustration you feel has a timeline. However getting intimate with each
other is also important so you need to get creative at it.
While you might get away with having sex in front of a child less than a year, you are going to be less lucky if you had one that is already curious about his environment and is at that mimicking state. To avoid any form of drama, it is advisable not to.
Stay Blessed
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