Leave These Habits In 2016!

As the year rolls to an end, as it custom for me, I take time to reflect on battles won, blessings received, friends made, and the impact I have had on those around me. Most importantly, I take time to go through the junk I may have accumulated during the course of the year – the conference programme I’m still holding on to five months later, the pair of shoes I know I won’t wear ever again because they just made my feet sore, the non-directional associations I may have built and the habits I developed against better judgement.

What I have come to realize is that during the course of every year, we accumulate things – the things we need, the things we want, and the things other people tell us we should have – habits included. Some people tell us to be more dramatic in our approach when we want to confront someone who has hurt us (like we need to pull one of those cheaters show confrontations to prove we are not stupid); some people tell us we need to be more mellow in how we talk about our dreams, and of course others deposit the seed of self-doubt in us by pointing out the things we are not so great at. Whatever the case may be, the fact remains that we accumulate a lot of stuff- the necessary and the unnecessary, and it is important to shed some of the weight if we intend to win in the New Year. To win in 2017, I advise that you leave these behind.

You are more capable than you think

#1 Self-doubt: I can write you a book about self-doubt and how crippling it is, because I have experienced it. Many people seem to stand firm, but one negative word from a person they believe is better than they are sends them into the pit of doubt, and causes them to forget about the pursuit they were so passionate about. If that’s you, it is time to reawaken the zeal and come back with a bang. Whatever anyone has said is not the final say. You may not be as good as they are, but you surely would not get there by giving up. Get up, dust yourself off and ease back into the path of your dream. Faith it till you make it!

#2 The leaf-on-a-lake mentality: Have you ever seen a leaf on a flowing lake? It goes wherever the lake goes. It is pushed in the direction of the lake irrespective of what the destination of the lake is. This is what many people have become in 2016, and are planning to continue with in 2017 – swayed by the opinions of friends, frenemies, colleagues, and even strangers, simply because they want to be accepted. If you cannot be accepted as you are by those you spend time with, you need new company. Sure, they are positive tweaks that can be made to your personality based on constructive conversations with friends; but that should not lead to a mob mentality. Don’t accept something is right because everyone around you says to. Don’t give up simply because the popular opinion is that you are about to tread a difficult path. The popular opinion is not necessarily the right one or the wise one for that matter. Be woke for your own sake. Don’t let others tell you how your life should play out.

Comparison breeds bitterness and jealousy!

#3 Comparison: The temptation to compare is so strong that simply telling you to stop comparing is not going to cut it. You must compare; by all means, do. But make sure you are comparing yourself with yourself. Where were you yesterday? Where are you now? Where are you heading? Have you moved from where you were yesterday in terms of emotional, psychological, and relational maturity? Even if you have only moved an inch, kudos to you! Now, focus on moving your desired amount of inches, centimetres, metres, or even kilometres in 2017. YOUR DESIRED AMOUNT, not Pete’s or Sally’s – Yours. This is a one-man race.

#4 Aimless movements: These days, I see many people take pride in telling others how busy they are. The most common comment I have heard this year is “I am so busy”, and when I ask “with what?” I get a rambling of sorts that tells me ‘shucks this person is busy! But not really busy with a goal in mind”. I will admit that used to be me – busy chasing ten hens at once and hoping to catch all ten even though they are running in different directions. This is what I call aimless movements. Leave this in 2016. Define the goals you want to achieve in 2017! Don’t spend the whole year being busy and at the end, no one, including you can pinpoint what you were busy with. Define the goals; make sure they are realistic and chase after them. Make sure you don’t get distracted by the occasional bandwagon that’s heading nowhere in particular. 

Wish you an amazing 2017! XOXO